It would appear that I took the summer off…..

But I’m back!! Stay tuned! A couple of my manis from the past couple weeks 💅🏼 I’m still loving the Sally Hansen Miracle Gel polishes. 

I miss the accountability that writing gives me. So I’m going to fine tune my blog whilst learning more of the tech side. Make it all pretty and stuff. 😁💜

 Happy Sunday!!

Wellness Wednesday, well Thursday 😁

So it WAS Wednesday and I want to talk about spring!! The days are longer, the temperatures are creeping up….the sun feels warmer and more lovely….I’m a sucker for spring fever!!! Baseball starts, all good stuff!! It leads me to want to be out. Any chance I get I want to have the sun on me. It also makes us want to start a garden, well it does for me. I’m still reading my garden book. 😁 It’s helping me to not trip over myself with the when where and how. Lord knows I make myself dizzy once I get something in my head. I still need to get me some purple garden gloves!! 😁😁😁 Anyhow I want to be out, we are out on the deck again with the tiki torches. We’re grilling….now we’ll need to prep more. It’s way too easy to just grab stuff that goes together: pasta salad, brats, hot dogs and potato salad is my ultimate weakness!! Lightened up stuff is the way to go for us. I’m down 23 pounds with Weight Watchers and I’m not done! I need to be super focused!! No distractions, well not until Boston! I am looking forward to the visit and the food! There’s nothing like Boston’s pizza, seafood and Italian food!! I’m gonna have to fit in some exercise for it all!!😁😂 2 weeks from today!! 

Oh P.S. I’m still super sore from Monday’s Crossfit debacle 🏋🏼‍♀️😲

Have a great week peeps!! 🏋🏼‍♀️🌱⭐️😁💜

My word of the year: Humble 😁

Good evening peeps!! 

Happy Monday!

So My Love is traveling on business so it’s just me and my lil lady Bailey. Admittedly it’s pretty lame around here without him. ☹️ Also I shall admit that Thursday at 11PM can NOT get here fast enough!! 😊 

It’s early 2017 and I’m kicking so much butt!! I’m learning a lot of stuff simultaneously so that is how I’ve come to pick my word of the year: Humble. Between work and Crossfit, I’m overcoming being crappy at stuff….I’m taking critiques and learning from them. Am I getting mad? Hell no I’m thankful for the time and the looking out!! I’m getting better by the day. My confidence is mounting, I’m eating frogs on the regular!! 🐸 🐸 🐸

I’m being a coupon queen again now!! It feels so good to save money!!! 💰 We eat really clean and it’s always been said that you can’t eat clean on a smaller budget. I’ve been saving a bunch already this year!! My goal was to save $100 this month, and I’m already at about $200 saved and we are only half way through the month!!


Good thing I’m saving all kinds of money, I just picked up 2 of my prescriptions for a 30 day supply and it was $173.00! GODDAMN!!! 😡🤢😵 My “Miracle Medication” is $155.00 this month. It goes up to $170 sometimes. My insurance saves me like $900 on it too. What a ripoff!! Good thing I’m rich!! 😁 It’s pretty expensive to get me “normal-ish” 😂😂😂 Botox, medications…..shiiiiiiitt!! Normal…..NO THANKS!! 😆


Gotta go, that’s my dinner!! 

Have a great week peeps!! Love, Chrissi and Bailey 🐶🐾❤️

So, I’m working on some stuff…

I shall begin by saying that consistency is not one of my strong suits. Now that that’s out of the way….I’m working on some stuff.  I’m trying to being a great Dog Mom, which I’m doing well at. I’m trying to be a good girlfriend, which I’m doing well at. I’m trying to be a good person, which I’m doing well at. I’m trying to be a good bestie, which I’m doing well at. Now, here is where the trouble comes in: I’m trying to be good to me…I’m failing MISERABLY!

I can do a lot of things well but wherever and whenever it comes to me I stumble and fail over and over again. Why is that? Wish I knew…..but I’m working on it. I read badass go get it girl books, I have My Love feeding me love every day, my therapist questions me on it, yet I’m beating myself up any chance I get. I’m not acknowledging my value. So how do I fix it? I’m not too sure. Just do better I think…take my meds, sleep well…I do that.  Love myself. I kinda do. I wish I could see me like My Love does!!  He LOVES me! Eat right and exercise…I’ll work on it. What else?! Ummmm  I’m trying to start to get out of my comfort zone a bit. My paperwork is all filled out for my Cosmetology and Esthetics licenses in Michigan. 😃 I want back in the industry and I want to wax. 😃 I know I’m a weirdo!!  I love that shit!! Anyhow I’m going to WW tomorrow and the dentist and My Love comes home from Cali late night!!!  Walk tomorrow!!  Cure HD!!  I’m gonna be a mushy mess, my Dad and my sweet little Grammy gone from it. It’s bullshit honestly. I’m not gonna pull the oh so popular “It’s not fair!” crap. Where does it get you?!  It’s annoying to the listeners. I’m going the crusader route! The closest HD branch is an hour away but I’ll get in there somehow ☺️ Let’s get this shit cured!!

Happy Thursday!!

 

Here’s my fundraising link:

http://hdsa.donordrive.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=donorDrive.team&teamID=6327

 

Damn it, I’m Winning the Day!!!

Good evening ladies and gentlemen!!

I hope everyone had a great holiday.  Our Christmas was great and quiet…does it get any better!?!?  Great food, My Love finally having a few days in a row off in a row.  Beautiful Christmas with Miss Bailey!  Her first Christmas and she loved it because she got cool stuff. 🙂

I went to that Barre class again today…I’m smoked head to toe.  I was violently shaking in all of my muscles by the time class was over and I was doing the MODIFIED exercises.  I can’t wait to get better so I can do the real ones.

I also got going on my calendar, filling it up with doctor appointments, happy hours, coffee talks, lunches, conference calls and webinars.  I love networking!!

I’ve been twitching in my hands and it’s annoying.  All the prescriptions will do that.

I started to find other Huntington’s Disease blogs.  One that I found is NO JOKE!  She’s raw and honest and it scares the crap out of me.  A couple others are more my speed.  Other BiPolar blogs are also scary, well the ones I’ve seen.  I’ll just hang out in my bubble thanks.  I STILL haven’t made it to the BiPolar support group…I’m chicken.

On a side note: My Bruins just beat My Love’s Redwings!!  WHOOP WHOOP!!!

I just slaved over the stove and oven for leftover paleo chicken nuggets and leftover mashed potatoes…YUM!!!

Now to finish off my calendar and chill out with My Love and Miss Bailey!

HAVE A GREAT WEEK!!! ❤ Chrissi

I’m working on getting better…

So…in Denver it’s snowing for the second day in a row.  Miss Bailey had her first snow experience yesterday.  SHE LOVED IT!!!  That’s great except it’s freezing and she keeps wanting to go out.  I like snow so I don’t mind going, but twice an hour is a bit excessive. 🙂  I still do not want to own a winter coat so my hoodies are workin it!

I’m back to “work” this week…well today is my first day.  Networking get togethers: meeting people, exchanging information…following up.  Building relationships and hopefully gaining their trust…tricky anyway, but especially if I’m not able to carry on a complete conversation, keep eye contact or my favorite…shaky rambling that is blatant over speak…even for me! 🙂

I’ve been feeling alone in my Bipolar world so since I have weight to lose anyway I got back on Sparkpeople.com.  As per usual I invite you to add me if you’re on there: chrissipenney is my name 🙂  I love the groups and one is a local Denver one and I’m hoping to get a workout buddy out of it.  Or at least a weekend puppy meet up…something!

I’ve been struggling to keep anything consistent…the only thing that’s consistent is my less than stellar attitude.  I spend hundreds of dollars a month to be able to keep my cool…why does it work sometimes and not others?  A lot of days lately I think I should go to boxing  so I can get my rage out…I don’t think they have it at my gyms.

I feel like I am just not me…and I’m WAY over it!  Truth is I’m much better…but not quite right at all…these extra meds haven’t kicked the bad out like they were supposed to so I shall try to continue to be patient…yeah right, I wanna be fixed like last month!!!

Day 2 of super clean eating!!  Go us!  I want sushi! Not yet….

Here’s a few Bailey’s first snow 🙂  Have a great week  my super fab readers!!!

photo 1 What is this stuff? SHE LOVES IT!!!!!

The silver lining is showing

I’ve been better…

How are all of you, my awesome readers?

I’ve been banished to my house so as not to make a fool out of myself with poor behavior.  My filter isn’t functioning on all cylinders.  Also I look like I don’t feel good.   I’ve been in the dark place for a week and a half now and only today did I start to feel human again.  Last week I had to add 2 new medications into my repertoire but they didn’t seem to put a dent in my anger and dark cloud.  Yesterday I had to double both new ones and as today went on I started to feel human again.  Once I watched Ellen I was certainly better 🙂  I was banned from networking for 2 weeks as per doctor’s orders.  I’m getting a little antsy now that I’m feeling a little better.

I am back from getting my Bailey girl.  She has sooooooo much fun at “day care”.  She didn’t want to leave although she was very happy to see me. (Loved every second of the kisses)  I actually missed the little Princess.  I did truly enjoy my meals with her gone.  Food tastes better if you’re not pushing her off of you.  She’s so much better with that, unless you’re eating something really good smelling. 😉

So I’ve been trying to read more consistently.  I try everyday but I’m not able to process or see every day, I think it’s my medications.  To get around this I have an Audible account and listen to books.  I listen in the car generally.  I just started Steve Harvey’s book Act Like a Success Think Like a Success.  I’m loving it so far!  My other book that I’m reading is Gabrielle Bernstein’s May Cause Miracles.  I’m super slow reading but I’m liking them so far!

I’m extremely self conscious about my Bipolar Disorder.  I feel like everyone’s judging me and thinking I don’t like them because I flake on things.  I’ll change my RSVP to things at the last minute.  I haven’t figured out how to say I’m in a mixed state and not having a good day.  I generally don’t give a reason because I don’t owe it to anyone, but I feel bad.  That’s my problem: I always feel bad.  Oh well, I’ll figure out something.  You know…that’s it: I’ll just tell them I’m not having a good day…problem solved!!!

I'm just feeling this right now...it's true!

I’m just feeling this right now…it’s true!

Relaxation on the home front…liking it!

Happy Hump Day!

I’m having a Bailey free day.  That is how I’m able to actually get a post done. 🙂

I love her to pieces but she’s requiring a ton of attention that really needs to be spent getting things accomplished. So My Love being the awesome and amazing man that he is, offered to get Bailey into daycare one day a week.  This is amazing because now I can do my calls, maybe vacuum since she hates it, my opportunities are endless!  Also she LOVES Nancy and Mike at Bark at the World Petsitting.  That’s where she was for the week we went to Boston.  We saw her in pictures on Facebook already LOVING IT!!!

I have been in a rough patch with my lovely BPD.  It’s been flip flopping for almost 2 months now.  We had to add a couple of prescriptions until it breaks.  More prescriptions means more side effects…yippee dee do da…my ass.  I just feel so frustrated…Adding in new meds makes me feel like a puppet until it levels out.  Down in the dumps one day, flying high the next…it’s like playing the lottery.

Last week we went for a family road trip: My Love had some work to do in Durango, CO.  I decided to tag along with the pup.  Damn, it was GORGEOUS!  San Juan National Park is a bucket list type of gorgeous with the foliage and mountain views…man oh man…The Aspen trees, the pine trees, great view…and it just goes on forever!

I’ve been banned from networking since my filter is nonexistent and I’m in over talk overdrive.  It’s for the best. 🙂 So I’m relaxing, and watching Ellen in 2 minutes!!!

Puppy on the bed...nailed it! Bailey strikes!!! Gorgeous Aspen trees

I need a real camera to do that justice!

I need a real camera to do that justice!

Bruins are on!!!

Welcome back hockey!!!
I am quite pleased to hear hockey at my house. 😃 It’s odd to not have October baseball. Thanks for a great season Boston!! I’m loving the Patriots so far!! Bring in the hockey!!!

I’ve been quite lost today. I’ve been all out of whack with my Bipolar Disorder recently. I feel like I’m on auto-pilot for a blah day. I’m recovering. 😃

Traveling really poops me out! It is compounded by the go go go go theme of our visit…same old same old right!? Family time, wedding, apple picking, bestie night, seeing my Gram at her nursing home and my Dad’s plaque…exhaustion that is both physical and mental.

Something happened before we went to Boston that’s resonated with me. I saw an article on Facebook I think, and it was a woman who blogs for herself about Huntington’s Disease. It helps her to know other people are out there who are feeling what she feels and hurts in very similar ways to her. That’s what I want with my blog. I want people to read my blog and be relieved to know that they’re NOT alone.

I just lost my Dad to HD in January…I know the pain. I’ve been watching my Gram deteriorate for the past almost 20 years. I know what it’s like to see my Dad shake and slur and think I’m my Sister.

I feel like I’ve been fundraising for HD forever. It’s a part of who I am and part of my faith in a cure. I pray for a cure, I pray for treatments, I pray that no one else will have to feel like this anymore.

So I’m broadening my horizons for my blog. Mental health issues and Huntington’s Disease are where I’ll reside. 😃 They go hand in hand a lot for me. I’ve been talking about myself a lot and I apologize, however, it’s good for me to make it known.

I want to be your go to girl to get a hug and an understanding squeeze from. We can be there going through it together. We got this!!

So, are you going through it too?

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My goodness…I sure am crabby

HAPPY MONDAY!!!

I hope all of you are getting moving for a great week!

I got to go to yoga so my Monday is back on track!  I just love it.  I’m not that good yet but I’m already seeing improvements in my balance and my upper body strength.  I’ll take it!  I was hoping that it would help me get out of my head a bit, it only worked very temporarily, I’m still miserable.  I just can’t seem to shake this funk.  It’s been at least a week, possibly 2 that I’m very irritable.  I’m just an absolute witch in my head, but I keep it in there; you can’t just go around being mean to people.  When I’m sitting down “relaxing” I’m off in never never land, not paying a bit of attention.  This reminds me that I must call my Doc.  I hope it goes away soon…I hate when I’m like this!!! 😦

We had a great week of food!! Turkey tomatillo burgers, baked chicken with artichokes, roma tomatoes, mozzarella and basil, sushi…..yummmmm!!

We have been exercising a bit but we need to kick in high gear this week.  I WILL do 4 workouts this week!!  We leave for a week to Boston for my cousin’s wedding on October 1st. I’m hoping to stay on track while we’re there, although the week is already jam packed full of busyness!  This past week when I did workout it was just a half hour on the treadmill walking.  My Love is helping me to make sure I do SOMETHING, even if it’s not all out full throttle.  THANK YOU MY LOVE!

Just keep swimming right?  Swimming, walking…whatever 🙂  I keep struggling with the getting moving and keeping on track…but so does everyone else right? 🙂 I just hate not being me…but please believe that as cranky and miserable as I am I can still laugh and smile and carry on.  I’m just very sad inside.

I almost burst into tears last night out of frustration with Bailey, again! She sure is cute….and maddening!!!  She is getting better but with my massive cranky time I feel like I’m a bad pup Mom.  My Love says I’m WAY too hard on myself…but that is all part of my journey.  I need to get better but when I’m in my funk not too much will help me be better with myself.  When I’m good I’m great but I’m not right now so I’m unhappy and absent with a stupid headache.  I’ll be back soon…but for now: It’s almost time for Ellen…I need to get my laugh on!!! 🙂

What’s your go to happy place? What do you do to help you with your mood swings?

I can’t wait to go to Boston, I need the beach!

My filthy pup after an afternoon at the dog park :)

My filthy pup after an afternoon at the dog park 🙂

Baked chicken with artichokes, roma tomatoes, mozzarella and basil. #yum

Baked chicken with artichokes, roma tomatoes, mozzarella and basil. #yum

A little back in the day Shai as my background music. :)

A little back in the day Shai as my background music. 🙂

Baked chicken with artichokes, roma tomatoes, mozzarella and basil. #yum

Baked chicken with artichokes, roma tomatoes, mozzarella and basil. #yum